Why Friends Are Important to Your Mental Health
Written by Jennifer Reinhart
When we think of friendships, we often picture children learning to play together or adults hanging out and sharing a few laughs. Most people don’t think of friendship as a mental health strategy – at least not right away. In reality, humans are social by nature and friendships are essential to our mental health.
Why are friends good for mental health?
1. Friends help reduce stress and boost happiness
We all have bad days. Simply venting to a good friend about a frustrating experience can
provide enormous stress relief. Friends support us through some of life’s hardest
moments, such as illness, divorce, or death of a loved one. Kind and encouraging words
and gentle, welcome touch or hugs solidify connection and help to lift mood and mental
health.
2. Friends support our personal growth: As we learn in childhood, the people we surround
ourselves with often influence our lives and the choices we make. A strong support
system can help keep us accountable to our goals and step outside of our comfort zone.
Good friends afford us the opportunity to have stimulating conversations, supporting
cognitive health and giving us a sense of purpose.
3. Friends help us build self-love and confidence: There are days we feel on top of the
world and others when our self-confidence is drained. When a friend offers
compliments and encouragement, it helps to increase our confidence and reinforce self-
worth. At the same time, when we offer the same support to others, it lifts them up and
helps build our sense of purpose.
4. Friends help protect against loneliness: In post-pandemic life and with the rise of
remote work, loneliness has become more common. Frequent check-ins with our
friends, whether by text, phone call, or get-together, help to keep loneliness at bay and
support our overall mental wellbeing.
Making and Maintaining Friendships
Despite how easy TV shows and movies make it look, making and maintaining friendships as an adult can be difficult. Friends we had in earlier stages of our lives may drift away as interests
and lifestyles change. It’s all too common for new priorities, such as demanding work schedules or caring for children or parents to cause distance between longtime friends. If you’ve found yourself in this situation, you’re not alone.
So, how do you find new friends? Start by putting yourself in social environments where there
will likely be people with similar interests as yours. Perhaps you could volunteer for a cause
dear to your heart or pick up a new hobby. Have you always wanted to learn to paint or take a
cooking class? Maybe now is the time. Other ideas include attending community events or
joining a faith group which aligns with your beliefs.
Most importantly, take initiative. Reach out to someone you think you’d like to know better.
Extend an invitation for lunch, coffee, or a walk in the park, and accept invitations extended to
you. Keep trying and be consistent. Like anything else, building friendships takes practice. The
more you put yourself out there, the more comfortable it becomes.
Friendships are something you need to care for and maintain for them to thrive. Work on being
an active, invested listener. Be open to sharing your own thoughts and feelings. Build trust by
being kind, trustworthy, and consistent. Reach out to connect between visits with a text, card,
or other way of checking in and letting your friend know you’re thinking of them.
Finding and maintaining adult friendships isn’t just a nice luxury in life. The people we confide
in, lean on, and laugh with help shape our self-worth and influence the way we handle life’s
stressors. A quick check-in text, meetup for coffee, or accepted invitation can help maintain
strong connections with old and new friends. Those connections, in turn, support our own
mental health. And often, it starts with something simple: reaching out.
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